Couples who savor good times together report stronger relationships

Couples who savor good times together are happier

Couples who intentionally pause to appreciate positive shared experiences report higher relationship satisfaction, less conflict, and more confidence in their partnership's future. This finding comes from a new study by researchers at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign.

The study focused on the concept of joint savoring. "Savoring involves slowing down to become aware of and focus on positive experiences," said lead author and graduate student Noah Larsen. The research team wanted to see if the known individual benefits of savoring extended to couples.

How the study worked

The researchers surveyed 589 adults in romantic relationships across the United States. Participants completed an online questionnaire measuring how often they and their partners intentionally appreciated positive moments together.

They used a scale adapted from the Savoring Beliefs Inventory, called the Joint Savoring in Romantic Relationships scale. Participants also reported on:

• Their relationship satisfaction
• The amount of conflict in their communication
• Their confidence in the relationship lasting
• Their personal stress levels and overall well-being

Of the respondents, more than 85% were married, with an average age of about 39. The typical household income ranged from $85,000 to $95,000.

Joint savoring acts as a buffer against stress

The results showed a clear link between joint savoring and relationship health. "Individuals who engaged in more joint savoring with their partners reported less conflict with them, more satisfaction with their relationship and more confidence in their future together," Larsen said.

The protective effect was strongest for couples under higher stress. "When couples face greater stress, savoring can serve as a buffer, helping protect their confidence in their relationship and their mental health," Larsen explained.

Professor Allen W. Barton emphasized the importance of finding tangible strategies for couples. "Being able to identify factors that provide this type of buffering effect is important... as they provide tangible things that couples can do to keep their relationship strong."

A simple, practical strategy for couples

The researchers propose that intentionally focusing on shared positive experiences is a practical way to maintain a strong bond. They suggest it doesn't require a major time commitment.

"Finding time -- even just once a week -- to slow down, be present with your partner and talk about positive experiences... can really benefit you as a couple," Larsen said. He offered examples of what this could look like:

• Reminiscing about a happy memory from earlier in the relationship
• Fully enjoying a meal together without distractions
• Talking about an upcoming event you're both excited for

The researchers conclude that this intentional practice is especially valuable during stressful periods, acting as a reliable tool to strengthen the relationship foundation.